Create a powerful ritual. For example, on Sunday dinners, using your grandmother's china is a lovely symbolic gesture that says Sunday dinner in this family is important enough to get out the good china. Create a sense of place. Using grandma's china, for example, creates a real link to the past and you can start telling stories about grandma and other family members from the past. Kids who know more about their family history feel more connected to their family and report back later that their families are higher functioning. By ritualizing dinner a little bit, you create a sense of place and a real sense of belonging. Say a blessing or give a toast or say grace. Grace doesn't have to be tied to any religious doctrine; the potential grace has is that it is a habit that kids get into that evokes all kinds of positive emotions. Grace is an expression of gratitude or appreciation for the food, or for what you have. The important aspect is expressing positive emotions in the present; it makes us all feel tremendous joy and contentment. It is also an act of faith and optimism, which are positive emotions about the future. Hold hands around the table as you express your gratitude. That

is a way of showing that you love one another. Think of the things that children can express. Encourage them to find good things about their day, such as: "I had a great play date today"; "This is delicious food"; "Daddy gets to be home with us tonight"; "We all feel good"; "My cold is gone"; etc. Support their interpretation of the things that are worth being grateful for and make this a regular occurrence at the dinner table.